ulimative

Listen.
I know you're trying to help. I appreciate it, I really do. I do think you're going about it in the wrong way.
You're placing a high burden on yourself to "fix" me. I don't think that's fair. It wasn't fair of me to place my burdens onto you as well, and I am truly sorry for it. I shouldn't have told you any of that, and that's my mistake. I understand you care and love me, and I appreciate it, but I'm an adult. I should be able to handle what's going on. 
"You either come with us, or I'm having you admitted" -Where do I start with this?

The decision for me to move in with you two- It feels more like a half second decision. That doesn't sit right with me. Yes, you don't want to lose me, and yes you don't want to see me so upset...but you're making your own life. Bought your own house. I don't feel comfortable because i can already see the possibilities of what might happen, and most of them are pretty awful. Hospitalization: I have been hospitalized twice. I am where i am because clearly, hospitals do not work. Clearly. I enjoyed my stay at the first one, the second one was an absolute mess of a facility. Neither of which truly helped me in the slightest. I suppose I'm trying to show you what I'm thinking right now. If I move in with you, I'll be in crushing anxiety and guilt to the point i'll hide in my room and rarely come out (and worse), and if I go to the hospital I'll become jobless, more miserable, and will probably lose my apartment. I don't hate you for giving me that ulimative, i just don't think you know exactly what you've signed yourself up for. I can see the future in both possibilities, and they're both stupidly bad.

I don't think i'll ever be mad at you for that, because in the end, it was my bad decision that this all happened. I hate myself for what i've done and what will happen. I don't want our friendship to change but...it already has in some point, and for that I really do blame myself, and not you. You were just reflexively reacting to the news.